PHYSICAL ABUSE

Physical abuse is any forceful or violent physical behavior toward another person that may or may not result in any visual signs or injuries requiring medical treatment. It is one of the common means many abusers use to control their victims through fear and physical intimidation. This type of domestic violence sometimes results in death. Some examples of physical abuse are:

• Slapping, scratching, pinching, restraining, kicking, burning, punching you
• Shoving, pushing, choking, squeezing, shaking, poking, grabbing you
• Pulling your hair
• Twisting your arm
• Pinning/holding you against a wall
• Throwing objects at you
• Throwing you around, down, across a room
• Striking you with an object
• Running into/over you with a car or motorcycle
• Ignoring your physical needs (food, shelter, intimacy, etc.)
• Spitting on you
• Pushing you out of a car
• Banging your head on the floor or furniture
• Homicide
• Whipping you with belt or other object
• Using a gun or knife on you

PSYCHOLOGICAL ABUSE

Psychological abuse is any threat to do bodily harm to a partner, a child, a family member, friends, pets, or one's self (suicide). It involves not only hurt and anger, but also fear and degradation. The purpose of psychological abuse is to render you emotionally insecure about your own self-worth and to render you helpless to escape further physical, sexual, and/or psychological abuse. Examples of this type of abuse are:

• Threatening to punch, hit, slap, kick, etc.
• Threatening to harm him/herself if you leave
• Threatening to harm pets
• Hiding, stealing, or destoying your possessions (especially those most important to you)
• Vague threats such as "You're going to get it," or "I'm really going to let you have it."
• Smashing, throwing, and breaking things
• Yelling and other displays of rage
• Any emotional abuse which previously led to an incidence of physical or sexual abuse
• Threatening to use a weapon
• Threatening to harm the children to "get back" at you
• Slamming doors
• Punching walls
• Sabotaging your car
• Harrassing you at work

EMOTIONAL ABUSE

Emotional abuse includes hurting another person's feelings by saying cruel things, making unfair comments, calling a person names, making jealous accusations, or doing things to control or limt your activities. The purpose of this type of abuse is to keep the victim in a position of submission, isolation, and low self-esteem. Some examples are as follows:

• Cursing, swearing, and/or screaming
• Insults, name calling, put-downs, and riducle
• Telling you that you are "sick" and need therapy
• Interrupting you while you are eating
• Forcing you to do degrading things like making you kneel or beg
• Criticizing your thoughts, feelings, opinions, beliefs, and actions
• Being extremely jealous, constantly accusing you of flirting or having an affair
• Using money to control you - taking money from you or not giving you access to the family finances, giving you an allowance, devaluing the economic contribution of your housework for the family
• Using physical, emotional, or mental disabilities against you or putting you down for your disability
• Repeated harassment, interrogation, or degradation
• Threating to embarrass you in front of your family, friends, or coworkers
• Forcing you to stay awake or waking you up too early
• Blaming you for everything that goes wrong
• Using the difference in physical size to intimidate you
• Treating you like a servant or "underling" in matters of household chores and decisions
• Spitting at or near you
• Controlling and/or limiting your behavior - keeping you from using the phone or seeing your friends, not letting you leave the room or house, checking the mileage on your car, keeping you from reading books or magazines he/she does not approve of, monitoring/limiting your internet activity

SEXUAL ABUSE / ASSAULT

Sexual assault can be defined as any sexual act committed without the other person's consent and/or against that person's will. It can occur in conjunction with other types of domestic violence, particulary before or after physical violence. It can be committed by force (violence or physical restraint), coercion (threats, psychological manipulation), or incapacitation (use of drugs or alcohol, while you are sleeping). It may involve:

• Forcing you to have sex with other people
• Uncomfortable or unwanted touching
• Physically attacking a body part (grabbing your breasts, pinching your buttocks, etc)
• Sadism or masochism
• Withholding sex and affection
• Incest

Sexual abuse does not necessarily involve physical contact. It can include:

• Insisting that you dress in a more sexual way than you wish to dress or making demeaning comments about the way you dress
• Making demeaning remarks about your body and/or body parts
• Berating you about your sexual history - blaming you if you were sexually abused in the past
• Calling you a whore or a slut
• Telling degrading sexual jokes about women in your presence
• Harassing you about imagined affairs
• Minimizing your feelings about sex
• Having affairs with other women (and flaunting or bragging about them to you) after agreeing not to have sex with anyone but you
• Treating you (and women in general) as sexual objects